Just Dance.

Friday, February 22, 2008

seriously. and you ask me why i don't like to tell you things. WHICH thing have i EVER EVER done, that you have NOT questioned.
from wayyy before, during my pri school days, you questioned me on my homework, but thats alright, every parent does that.
till my sec school days, you questioned me on my cca. on why i needed to be so committed when YOU yourself were from a sports team in your younger days. you questioned me on whether im studying hard enough or not when I was obviously trying very hard.
till my days in VE. you questioned my job, you questioned me as to i knew what i was doing. on the outside you seemed to be so nice, encouraging me and all, acting the victim cause she was blaming you and all. saying you don't reject it at all, WHEN YOU DID NOT MEAN IT AT ALL. okay. its not fair to say you didnt mean it. but IF you DID mean it, it certainly didn't show.
then were my days when i was retaking my Os. once again, you questioned me as to whether i was working hard enough or not. you questioned my decision on going out to study.
then it was my days in borders. its obvious you don't agree with borders. or rather, you just don't agree with your sister. you didn't question my decision, at least not in front of me, but its obvious you're still reluctant.
up till now. im trying to learn to be independent yo. to earn my own keep. you have to question my every move. you have to question my every decision. you have to question my job. you make stupid comments that you don't realise are hurting me so badly. you make stupid comments as if im really that dumb to not be able to watch out for myself. you say retarded things to make it out as if i dont know what im in for.

GODDAMMIT IM 18 THIS YEAR! i know 18 is not very old, 18 is still a kid, in fact, the only thing that changes is that im legal. thats all. but whether or not im 18, I HAVE A MIND OF MY OWN DAMMIT. I KNOW HOW TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR MYSELF. I KNOW HOW TO WATCH OUT FOR MYSELF.

im pissed as it is, what with all the crap going on with my travelling, with my results, with my applications, with the lack of rest and all that. JUST SAVE ME ALL THAT CRAP! seriously, get a life. i know you care, i know its cause you have the responsibility to, but really, im drowning here hello! im suffocating. i know i've been a lucky kid with lots of freedom since young, but if you're really giving me that freedom, then please DON'T take it back by questioning my every move and decision.

love,jane-
because fish can only drown in water ?

Labels: i need some skittles.